Freshers as a third year

Oh god i'm a third year. When did this happen? I'm so old... 

Freshers as a first year was pretty incredible. I went out quite a lot despite 9am starts the next day. I met new people, i went to new clubs, i moved to a new city 3 1/2 hours away from home. Yes it was scary but it was so exciting. I never wanted to miss out on anything. 

Freshers as a second year was different. I had my friends, I moved into a student house, i went out a few times, i went back and forth between domino's stands at the freshers fair getting free pizza for lunch. Life was quite nice. 

Freshers as a third year.. God i'm fed up. I'm fed up of the people handing flyers out- JUST LET ME WALK DOWN THE ROAD IN PEACE!! I want a sign that says "i'm a third year. Go away." I never made it to the freshers fair- which only lasted 2 days this year. I've gone out once so far and really didn't like it. I've never seen a club more cramped. No matter how much i drank as soon as i stepped on the dance floor all my efforts went into avoiding being pushed over and staying upright that i sobered up so quickly. I've also got no time for people who go to clubs to get with other people. I've got no desire to ever be part of that part of clubbing culture (good job i'm not single really.) I've also been having a bout of insomnia, leaving me grumpy and quite frankly knackered. My room's a mess which makes me more grumpy but i don't seem to have the time or effort to tidy. I've had clashes with my course modules so can't do all the ones i want to, and the department choose today to email me and tell me that they've had to switch my third year project supervisor from someone i was really happy with to someone i have no clue on. I'm worried what this means for my project. On the plus side my days have been really busy due to talks from my own course and being a student coordinator, meaning i run the peer mentor scheme for my course and have spent a lot of time sorting out issues with that and helping the first years settle in. This is a job, well its unpaid but meh, its a job i really love. I do tend to thrive when i'm busy. It makes me productive. Its helped me not to die due to my insomnia because i'm too occupied to be tired. 

Apologies for my rant. Blame the insomnia. I just hope i sleep tonight. A third night of no sleep may well be the end of me. 

I promise to be happier next time! 
Becky xoxo 

Productivity and then some...

Now as much as i love beauty and make up etc, at the end of the day i am a student. Its the biggest way in which i identify myself, next to gender, age and relationship status. Being a student is a big part of my life, its all i've ever known. I think i'm going to feel lost without my student status next year when i graduate (if i make it to graduation alive!)

In general terms I'm not the greatest worker, i'm not the most motivated, i'm a pro at procrastination and the amount of time i just spend faffing around could win me a gold medal (Rio 2016 anyone?) But get to exam time and i transform. Give me some pressure and i flourish. I'm not a morning worker really, it takes me a while to get going- like i dont start til half 10 or 11 depending on if i have to wash my hair. But i can work solidly (except a lunch break) from then until half 11. I used to finish earlier but as my courses get more demanding i have to keep going to get as much as i can done in a day! I could easily carry on in my zone but i have it in my head about needing to go to bed. I also have a boyfriend who i live with (along with 5 other housemates) who won't go to bed until i do- i suppose this could be due to the fact that we sleep in my room- the same one i study in so i have these things to put the brakes on! At home away from uni i suck so badly at working. I associate home now with not working and my brain switches off. Theres something about the atmosphere in my house that makes productivity very hard!

Ok.. i've really digressed from what i wanted to write about! Every now and then i get in a realllyyy productive mood! Normally this is a week night and normally in the evening after dinner. I just feel this buzz and know i have to do things and do them NOW! Its a really weird feeling, i feel like i'm separate from this mood. Like a dream where you know you're dreaming but you're living it anyway! I just know that i have to 'ride out' this mood of productivity and take full advantage of it while its around. At uni theres always plenty of work to do, but work things combined with my general everyday activities like tidying, washing or organising myself for lectures the next day will also help my productivity need be satisfied.

But its currently tuesday evening (i write my posts as and when but schedule them for tuesdays and fridays!) its about 10.35pm.. and its summer but i have one of my productive moods!!! There's absolutely NOTHING i can think of to do here thats going to satisfy my mood. I move back to university in 3 days but packing i know will not do it! It needs to be things that i can rush around doing, feel the buzz... argh its so infuriating!! what a waste of a productive mood!!! It it were only 2 weeks later i might have things to do!

So instead i sit here and bore you guys with my weird mood! Does anyone else ever get it or anything like it? Maybe its my mind being ready to go back to uni and be in that environment and frame of mind again. If thats the case i really hope so as i've not been wanting to go back really.

Anyways if you've got to the end of this post congratulations. Have another virtual cookie and a pat on the head :D

Becky xoxo

My brain is turning to mush...

I think the title sums it all up really. And i think my brain is turning to mush for 2 different reasons...
1.) British schooling
2.) Summer holidays

Back when i was in senior school, what i would give to be that carefree again, like most i studied many subjects years 7-9, then 10 subjects in years 10-11 for GCSEs. This got cut down to 4 subjects for A levels, Biology, Psychology, Maths and History. Now i study 2 subjects at university, Neuroscience and Psychology. I remember a week during my AS mocks where i had an exam in a different subject each day; biology one day, psychology the next etc. I remember being sat in my history exam beavering away at my essay on Henry VIII and being so "in the zone" for history that i thought 'how am i ever going to be able to do a maths exam tomorrow?' and sure enough the next day i sat there in what i thought of as my "maths frame of mind." I was amazed at my brain's ability to think in different ways- though given my degree subject i think its safe to say i am a bit partial to brains! :P

But now i don't know if i could do trigonometry (it took me 2 attempts and a lot of sounding out to even spell it!) I think the specificity of degree courses and the dropping of maths after As level (maths and i weren't meant to be!) closes off an ability that i once had. I know its impossible to be great at everything but it amazes me how one of my best friends since we were 5 who lives in America studies chemistry, french, psychology and probably lots more.. I do like British schooling. Its got me where i am today and it allows you to specialise quickly and to drop the subjects you hate, like physics (as a biologist i am scared of physics, proven by a module i took this year where they tried to teach us about seeing membranes as a circuit and my brain shut down because it has a physics phobia.) But I can't help but worry about my possible declining mathematic ability, or my uneasiness of writing a timed essay because only 2 of my modules so far in my degree have required an essay. In third year nearly all modules require an essay, which is the sign of in depth knowledge and is how final year modules should be examined. But i worry about my ability to show my knowledge within a time constraint and how to plan it all effectively. I suppose i will be taking advice from my boyfriend who does history and can bang out essays like there's no tomorrow.

Secondly i went from exam hell and revising solidly for about 13 hours a day to nothing. I can't imagine being back in lectures having to learn. I'm spending my free time reading blogs and watching videos about beauty, something which i love and enjoy don't get me wrong, but i feel my academic mind fading fast. I feel my motivation slipping. I don't want to go back to deadlines and trying to prove to staff and myself that i'm clever and deserve a good mark. I have intelligence but i really have to work for it to come across in an exam.

So i said to a lovely coursemate of mine about my mind turning to mush and she told me about TED (not the film as i first thought) but TED :
  http://www.ted.com/talks/tags/science
It looks amazing and i cant wait to explore more... as soon as their isn't an episode of Pretty Little Liars or The Glee Project to watch. Oh deary me, what is this madness!

That's all for now, apologies for the ramble. I can't shut up sometimes when i type!
Becky xoxo  

Introduction and blog schedule

Welcome to my little world! I'm currently a university student but will soon be out into the big wide world! Come with me as I blog about relationships and beauty! 

SCHEDULE! 
Beauty Tuesdays- A new beauty post every Tuesday including everything from favourites to hauls. 
Saturday thoughts- A new post every Saturday covering any topic to do with life

Enjoy,
Becky XOXO