Friday, 17 August 2012

My brain is turning to mush...

I think the title sums it all up really. And i think my brain is turning to mush for 2 different reasons...
1.) British schooling
2.) Summer holidays

Back when i was in senior school, what i would give to be that carefree again, like most i studied many subjects years 7-9, then 10 subjects in years 10-11 for GCSEs. This got cut down to 4 subjects for A levels, Biology, Psychology, Maths and History. Now i study 2 subjects at university, Neuroscience and Psychology. I remember a week during my AS mocks where i had an exam in a different subject each day; biology one day, psychology the next etc. I remember being sat in my history exam beavering away at my essay on Henry VIII and being so "in the zone" for history that i thought 'how am i ever going to be able to do a maths exam tomorrow?' and sure enough the next day i sat there in what i thought of as my "maths frame of mind." I was amazed at my brain's ability to think in different ways- though given my degree subject i think its safe to say i am a bit partial to brains! :P

But now i don't know if i could do trigonometry (it took me 2 attempts and a lot of sounding out to even spell it!) I think the specificity of degree courses and the dropping of maths after As level (maths and i weren't meant to be!) closes off an ability that i once had. I know its impossible to be great at everything but it amazes me how one of my best friends since we were 5 who lives in America studies chemistry, french, psychology and probably lots more.. I do like British schooling. Its got me where i am today and it allows you to specialise quickly and to drop the subjects you hate, like physics (as a biologist i am scared of physics, proven by a module i took this year where they tried to teach us about seeing membranes as a circuit and my brain shut down because it has a physics phobia.) But I can't help but worry about my possible declining mathematic ability, or my uneasiness of writing a timed essay because only 2 of my modules so far in my degree have required an essay. In third year nearly all modules require an essay, which is the sign of in depth knowledge and is how final year modules should be examined. But i worry about my ability to show my knowledge within a time constraint and how to plan it all effectively. I suppose i will be taking advice from my boyfriend who does history and can bang out essays like there's no tomorrow.

Secondly i went from exam hell and revising solidly for about 13 hours a day to nothing. I can't imagine being back in lectures having to learn. I'm spending my free time reading blogs and watching videos about beauty, something which i love and enjoy don't get me wrong, but i feel my academic mind fading fast. I feel my motivation slipping. I don't want to go back to deadlines and trying to prove to staff and myself that i'm clever and deserve a good mark. I have intelligence but i really have to work for it to come across in an exam.

So i said to a lovely coursemate of mine about my mind turning to mush and she told me about TED (not the film as i first thought) but TED :
It looks amazing and i cant wait to explore more... as soon as their isn't an episode of Pretty Little Liars or The Glee Project to watch. Oh deary me, what is this madness!

That's all for now, apologies for the ramble. I can't shut up sometimes when i type!
Becky xoxo  


  1. I know what you mean - by the end of summer I really don't feel like I'm in the right frame of mind to be academic again all of a sudden!

    I've been flicking through the Psychologist once a month and I keep trying to think about my subjects once in a while to keep my mind sharp but it's difficult haha. TED talks are also great for things like that. Hopefully it won't take us that long to get back into the swing of things!

    Katie xx

    1. do you buy the psychologist monthly? i looked up a subscription and felt too poor so i might just pick it up from time to time! still havent looked at any TED talks.. my poor brain!
      Becky xx

  2. What a lovely post! Your blog is lovely by the way! xx