Friday, 24 August 2012

To tell or not to tell...

That is the question. Who to tell about your blog?

At the current moment in time my boyfriend knows i'm writing a blog and we're having a text conversation where he's trying to convince me to let him read my blog but i'm not sure...If someone in my life finds my blog on their own terms then fair enough but i'm not sure i want to advertise it. I'm certainly not going to be to my friends "read my blog read my blog."

I'm actually quite a private person (Not the ideal quality trait in a blogger ey?) I was once in a relationship with a person who was the opposite to this. I really didn't like it when he told everyone things i'd rather be kept private, just things i'd said to him in texts etc. It didn't end the relationship but it taught me that I value my privacy in all aspects of my life. I know who i wouldn't want to know certain things etc.

I worry what people will think. People who know me know i have a large make up collection but may not understand why blogging about beauty is something i'm enjoying. Having a twitter and a facebook is pretty standard now but having a blog is still quite taboo. On twitter i might say i found £1.40 in the washing machine earlier and was wondering whether to keep it. On facebook i might put up pictures of me with my friends. But to put up pictures of my eyeshadow on a blog, or to write a post containing my thoughts on the honeymoon period in a relationship is something very different that you don't get anywhere else except your blog.

I also think that the person you are when you write may well be different to who you are to others in real life. For example I found a blog of someone i know who writes poetry- something i never knew about them, or i know that someone else i know is a lot more depressed than she lets on. Would she post these things if she knew i was reading them? I don't want to feel like i have to restrict what i say because people i know will be reading. I used to be pretty deep. Only listening to songs whose lyrics related to my life etc. Back then i was an awkward teenager and probably not genuinely happy. Now i don't do that anymore because i'm happy with who i am and i'm happy in my life. I don't have the huge lows where all i want to do is listen to songs to make me cry. Moving to university and being in my first serious, happy relationship has definitely changed me!

Lastly, along similar lines of writing about what i want, there are ways i know i want to use this blog. So for example if i want to talk about my own relationship i can. What i don't want to happen is to say certain things because i know my boyfriend is reading, or this housemate knows about my blog etc. I don't want to post making subtle hints or jabs towards my boyfriend in the hope that he might read it. Kind of like back in my msn days putting song lyrics in the personal message box to send hints to people. (Just me? Oh well...)

If you've got to the end of this ramble congratulations! Have a virtual cookie...

Do people in your real life know about/ read your blog?
Becky xoxo

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